Here We Are.

I've been in my internship for 4 months now. I really like it - I found good friends, found good work, and I get a good amount of stipends and privileges to cap it all off. There's nothing to complain about...except for the fact that I feel like right now, I'm waiting with bated breath for something. The wait is slowly but surely eating away at me, I think. I never did like not knowing what was going on, nor not being in control of my destiny. Today, as I wait for decisions that are out of my hands to be made, I feel slightly anguished.

Nevertheless, there are things to look forward to in the future. I hope to see more places, do more good work, and meet more awesome people. Simple, sweet, but I realize now that it's not without sacrifice. Nothing truly is. If I do this, I can't get something else, because life doesn't work that way. If you're going to be away from a country for a really long time, then you shouldn't get into a relationship with anyone from said country, because you're going to be away for so long and its going to suck, like trying to squeeze your head through a polo sweet.

That was a pretty terrible analogy, and for that, I apologize.

So now, while other aspects of my life are moving forward at a pleasant pace, I can't get into a healthy relationship. I know I shouldn't be rushing things, and that the time will come, eventually, but right now, I really would like a girl I can hang around with all the time. Fleeting about from date to date is just too tiring. Why don't I just stick to one date? Because that's not how non-relationships work. If you keep going out with the same girl over and over again, and if she's single, something's going to happen. Life is simple, like that.

So here we are, you and me together again, I, typing, and you, reading. I've gotten rusty, haven't I? I can feel my fingers aching, crying out in pain, as I move it furiously across the keyboard, at a pace it hasn't encountered since 2013 was with us. The joints creak, like doors in an abandoned house, yet it hops around with the energy of an old person who has just regained his or her youth.

There's life in this fingers, I can feel it. My mind is racing with things to say - somehow, I'm typing far more fluently than I had anticipated, and the energy is exciting, like drugs pumping through my veins. I like this feeling, and I've missed it more than I realise. One day I'll go back to writing again, and posting on Facebook, and getting a shitload of likes.

Life changed for me, fundamentally, about a month ago, when my phone died. Actually, my life changes very drastically with every single change that I encounter. I am a very malleable person, you see - bend me, and I will bend. I'll never break because I'm far too flexible. It's good, but how do you stay in shape? I don't know.

I'm beginning to ramble now. Maybe I should have thought about what I was going to type before my fingers started moving. A life of it's own, that's what I gave my fingers. Eyes closed, mouth against my pillow, head in the clouds, my fingers continue to say things, as they are thought of in my head. There is a lag, and a filter that the thoughts have to go through, but more or less, this is what I'm thinking.

Exciting things are in store. God have mercy on me and my soul.